Americans in Sword Art Online
by Funkyshnelpu jr
Summary: Five sixteen year old boys from the US are trapped in the world of Sword Art Online. With their lives on the line will they be able to survive the death game and reach the 100th floor? Probably not because they couldn't care less and would rather dick around than take this game seriously. OC-centric. OP OCs. Don't like? Then fuck off. M for language, sex, violence and other shit.


**An: Dear god, someone help me. I can't stop making new fanfiction. I already have several stories in progress. Granted, they're all cancer, but still. I haven't finished them, but I really need to. This is probably going to be the most cancerous of them all. Why? Because it's OC-centric and at least two of the OCs are paired with canon characters. Also, the OCs are stupidly OP. Why? Because I wanted to that's why. Don't like it? Fuck off and leave me alone. To be fair, no one really gives a shit about this anyway. I'm going to kill myself after this, don't worry. I do realize that this is the shitiest title ever, but I couldn't think of any good ones. I've taken a few artistic liberties and added and modified a several aspects to Sword Art Online, some of those aspects are taken from WoW and Diablo III. Alright, let's do this shit.**

 _November 1, 2022_

 _Virginia, United States_

 _Minutes before midnight_

Five sixteen year old boys stood in line at a local video game store as they awaited the release of Sword Art Online. Sword Art Online is a Japanese video game developed by Kayaba Akihito with two hundred copies of the game and NerveGear systems being available per state in the United States at midnight tonight, several days before the Japanese release. These five teenage boys were beta testers during the beta testing period of Sword Art Online. However, unlike most beta testers, all these boys did was mess around with each other instead of actually trying to clear the one hundred floors of Aincrad, the setting of Sword Art Online. The boys were currently discussing their plans for the real Sword Art Online. "Okay. Here's the deal." One boy said. He had brown hair tied into a long ponytail at the back of his head, brown eyes, and stood at five foot six. He was dressed in navy blue athletic shorts that hung past his knees with a lanyard hanging out of the left pocket, a grey t-shirt with an unzipped black jacket overtop, black socks, and blue and white basketball shoes. "As soon as we log in, we're going to party up and form a guild. All party members receive a five percent experience boost and guild members receive a ten percent experience boost."

"Yoshio, what are we going to name the guild?" Another boy asked. He had reddish brown hair in a crew cut, brown eyes, stood at five foot five, and had a light dusting of "Dorito dust orange" chin hair. He was dressed in grey slim fitting jeans, grey sneakers, a black long sleeved shirt with a black jacket overtop.

"Same thing as always, Andrew." The first boy, Yoshio, replied. "The Faffening."

"Nice." The second boy, Andrew, grinned.

"What about our roles?" A third boy asked. He stood at six foot two, had brown hair in the same crew cut style as Andrew, and had brown eyes. He was dressed in dark blue jeans, a blue Under Armour hoodie, and black sneakers.

"Same as the beta, Alex." A fourth boy answered. He had tan skin, brown eyes, dark brown hair in a crew cut, and stood at five foot seven. He was dressed in dark blue jeans, an olive green t-shirt with an unzipped navy blue jacket overtop, and dirty white tennis shoes. "I enjoyed the rogue like shit I did in the beta. I'll stick to that, Yoshi will stick with forging and heavy armor, You can stick with heavy armor as well, Ameer will probably stick with being the medic, and Andrew will be the the potions master or whatever."

"Tony's right." The fifth boy, Ameer, replied. He had medium length black hair, brown eyes with glasses, and stood at five foot seven. He was dressed in blue jeans, a black t-shirt with an unzipped black jacket over top, and black sneakers. "I'll be the medic. I actually enjoyed it. Granted it was unnecessary because we all had battle healing, but it will come in handy when we do raids and dungeons and shit with other people."

"Okay. Once we party up and create our guild. We are going to immediately start completing the quests on the first floor. Once we complete all of the first floor quests we're going to start grinding and recruiting other members to our guild to get that fifteen percent experience boost for every ten members in our guild, not including the original five. Any questions?" Yoshio, nicknamed Yoshi, asked.

"Do we want to get mounts or no?" Tony asked.

"You're fucking retarded." Andrew said. "Of course we want mounts, dumbass. They'll make traveling so much faster. We can't get mounts until we're level fifty. We're going to get our mounts on the fifteenth floor because that's where the dragon mounts are and those are the best mounts."

"Oh. Okay." Tony replied.

"Doors are opening, guys." Alex stated. All five boys glanced at the opening doors. The boys squeezed through the door before the store employee opened it completely. The rushed to the checkout counter and handed over their receipts for their games. The clerk handed over their games and the boy's sprinted out of the store and over to Yoshio's car. A sleek black 1967 Chevrolet Impala. The boy's hurriedly piled into the car and buckled themselves into the smooth leather seats as they shot out of the parking lot to the sound of Tokyo Drift by Teriyaki Boyz.

Yoshio raced to a hairpin turn at well over the speed limit and drifted around the curve before continuing down the road. Andrew grinned and cheered loudly from the passenger seat. They arrived at Yoshio's house ten minutes later. The boys hurriedly got out of the car and raced into his house. They found a comfortable spot and plugged their NerveGear headsets in before putting in Sword Art Online. Yoshio's parents were in Japan to attend a friend's funeral and would be visiting friends and family, so Yoshio had the house to himself for the next few weeks. Since their state had been struck by a sudden and surprising snowstorm that was keeping them all out of school, his friend's parents were okay with them spending the next few days at his house.

"Link start!" the boys said, and were sent headlong into the world of Sword Art Online

 _November 2, 2022_

 _Virginia, United States_

 _Ten minutes after midnight_

The NerveGear checked and calibrated the boys' five senses. A box popped up that instructed the boys to choose a language. The boys choose their language, English, and were brought to the Character Creation screen. A second box popped up that told them that beta test data was still available and asked if they wanted to use it, to which the boys selected yes. The words **Welcome to Sword Art Online** appeared before them and then disappeared as they descended through a tunnel of blue light. White light filled their vision as they entered the world of Sword Art Online.

The boys blinked slowly as they cleared their vision and were met with the sight of the beginning town. "We're here!" Yoshio cheered in a high pitched, feminine voice.

"Jesus Christ!" Andrew exclaimed in surprise. The boys turned to look at him. His avatar had brown hair that fell to his temples and had bangs that were swept to the left side of his face, so that they were not falling in front of his eyes. He also had bright green eyes. He was dressed in a blue shirt with sleeves that ended mid forearm, a brown leather chest piece, brown pants, a brown pouch rested against his left hip and was held in place by a belt of brown cloth, tan fingerless gloves, and brown boots. His character's name, **Big Moist** , was displayed above his avatar. "I totally forgot that your avatar was a chick."

It was true. Yoshio's avatar was an attractive woman with long blonde hair, dazzling blue eyes, an hourglass figure, and large breasts. His avatar was dressed in the same clothes as Andrew except his shirt was pink instead of blue. His character's name was **Professor Steelmeat**.

Alex's avatar had blue eyes, brown hair in a crew cut, and was very tall. He had the same starting gear as Andrew. His character's name was **AMimeHavingAStroke**.

Tony and Ameer shared the same starting gear as Alex and Andrew. Tony's avatar was the size of a dwarf, had short blue hair, pink eyes, a fat nose, large teeth, fat lips, and a thick facial hair on his neck. His character's name was **BorderJumper**

Ameer's avatar had shaggy red hair, a flat face, and red eyes. His character's name was **BreakfastAtDinner**. "I have no idea how you guys can like how your avatar's look." Alex said and shook his head. "Alright, we're all here. Let's party up and go to the start our guild." He sent his friends a party invite, which was accepted by all three.

"Hey," Yoshio said. "There's a book put together by all of the beta testers in our inventory." The boys flipped through their books. "I wonder what's different in this version."

"We'll find out." Alex replied. "Let's just go make our guild." The other boys nodded and they followed him through the city. As they walked, they saw people start to enter the game in cylinders of white light.

"We've got a one handed sword as a starting weapon." Andrew remarked, reading from the guide book, as the walked through the Commercial District. "Players start off with two skill slots, with a third slot granted at level six, a fourth one granted at level twelve, a fifth on level twenty, and an additional slot every ten levels afterwards. Skills may be trained up to level 1,000, at which point it is considered completed."

"I'm going to start off with the **Heavy Metal Armor Forging** as one of my **Support Skills** and **One-handed Sword** as one of my **Combat Skills**." Yoshio stated. "I think it's a good idea to choose a weapon type equipment as our first **Combat Skill** because we're bound to get weapons before we get armor."

"Sounds good. I'm going to start off with the **Lumber** **Support Skill** and the **One-handed Dagger Combat Skill**." Tony replied.

"Nice." Andrew nodded. "I'm going to start with **Drug Mixing** as my **Support Skill** and **Two-handed Straight Sword** as my **Combat Skill**."

"Nice." Alex stated. "I'm going to choose **Metal Refining** as one of my **Support Skill** as well and choose **Two-handed Battle Axe** as my **Combat Skill**."

" **Purchase Negotiating** is going to be my **Support Skill**." Ameer said.

"Cause you're Chinese and you're going to try to get things for as cheap as possible?" Yoshio joked.

"Okay, fuck you, Yoshi." Ameer glared. Yoshi and the other boys burst into peals of laughter. "Anyway, my **Combat Skill** is going to be **One-handed Rapier**."

"Good. Now we all know what we're going to start specializing in. How close are we to the **Guild Hall**?" Alex asked.

"The **Guild Hall** is located in the center of the **Social District** , which is located west of the **Commercial District** and south of the **Residential District**." Yoshio said, reading from his guidebook as well.

"Great we're on track then." Alex said. "Oh, look, there it is." The boys approached the Guild Master in charge of forming new guilds.

"We'd like to form a **guild**." Alex said.

"I'm sorry." The Guild Master said. "Guilds cannot be formed until the third floor has been cleared."

"Fuck!" Andrew shouted. "Dammit! Alright. Let's just go do some quests." The boys then began the walk out of Starting City.

"Hey, look." Alex said, pointing to a board with dozens of papers nailed to it. "The Bounty Board. Let's grab these before we leave." The boys accepted all of the Bounties before they left Starting City.

"What's the first one?" Andrew asked, equipping his sword. The other boys decided to do the same, lest they forget and rush into battle unarmed.

"A farm is being harassed by a large pack of wolves. The wolves are killing livestock and ruining crops. They need someone to travel to the **Wolf Den** and get rid of the **Den Mother**. There is an added bonus if a pack of **Wild Boar** are removed from a **Neighboring Field** as well." Yoshio replied. "I know that there is an **Abandoned Shop** hidden in the woods on this floor, near an **Abandoned Lumber Mill** and an **Abandoned Town**. The type of shop is random. Let's hope it's a blacksmith's shop. The Lumber Mill will help Tony level up his **Lumber** skill."

"Good idea." Alex said. "We should try and find it. Isn't it near an an abandoned inn called Eagle's Nest?"

"I think so." Yoshio replied. "That seems like it might be correct. We'll have to look."

"Is that the farm?" Tony asked and pointed at a farm on the map in the guidebook.

"Yeah." Ameer replied. "It is."

"Then that's the farm right there." Tony said and pointed at a farm they were approaching. The farm was simple. A small red house with six fields surrounding it and several pens holding different animals.

"Let's go." Andrew said and jogged up to the front door of the house. He knocked on the door and a pretty blonde haired woman answered. She was dressed in a simple pale green dress with a white apron overtop of it.

"Are you here to help us with our wolf problem?" she asked.

"We are. Can you tell us where the den might be?" Andrew replied.

"The **Wolf Den** is located in a cave to the north. It's deep in the **Misty Forest**. Good luck." The woman answered and closed the door.

"Where's the **Misty Forest**?" Tony asked.

"It's several miles north of us. We just have to travel in a straight line and we'll reach it." Ameer replied.

"Let's go. The faster we finish this, the more time we have to start work on another quest." Alex said and started walking off in the direction of the Misty Forest.

The boys walked through an unnamed forest whilst they discussed several aspects of Sword Art Online; the best grinding places, the best order to choose their skills, and who would choose what skill among other things.

Suddenly, Yoshio tripped over something. "Shit." he muttered sitting up to look at what he tripped over. It was a body covered in blood and leaves with an arrow sticking out of its back. A large brown traveling pack lay at the body's feet. "Guys, take a look at this." His friends jogged over to look at what he found. "I tripped over this body right here. There's a **Traveling Pack** by its feet. Should we open it?"

"Hell yeah!" Andrew replied. "Let's see what's inside this bad boy." Yoshio grabbed the traveling pack and opened it. "There's a **Rusty Dagger** , a five **Stale Pieces of Bread** , and a large bag with a note attached to it."

"The **Rusty Dagger** 's a piece of shit." Tony said, crossing his arms. "The **Stale Pieces of Bread** give you almost no health. Let's just take the bag with the note, it might give us a quest."

"Guys, hold up a second." Alex said. "You remember during the beta, when everyone was looking through the forests on the floors in the hopes that they'll find the incredibly rare **Scribe's Task** quest?"

"Yeah?" Yoshio replied. "What about it?"

"Turn the body over." Alex said, excitement evident in his voice. Yoshio turned the body over and was shocked by what he found. A white fleur-de-lis was clearly stitched into the fabric of the tunic the body was dressed in.

"Oh my god." The boys gaped.

"This is the scribe that gives you the **Scribe's Task** quest." Alex gasped. "Yoshi, open the bag up. Is there an **Uncut Chunk of Crystal** in there?"

"N-No." Yoshio stuttered. His friend's faces fell in despair. "There's five of them." The boy's faces lit up once again. "The-The-The quest must increase the number of crystals to match the number of people in the party. If we take the cut versions to an **Enchantress** , she can give them magical properties which can then be added to a weapon or armor with a forging skill of fifty. This is awesome." He closed the bag up and put it in his inventory. "We need to get to the third floor as soon as possible. It's not safe to keep this in our inventory. If we get killed, we lose all our gear. We need that **Guild Inventory**."

"Agreed." Ameer replied. "Let's hurry to the **Wolf Den**."

"You're right. Let's go." Andrew said. The party of five returned to their trek through the woods, unable to keep their new quest off of their minds.

"Okay. What do we need to do for the **Scribe's Task**?" Alex asked.

Yoshio glanced at the new quest in the quest log. "We have to take the crystals to a castle in the middle of a lake that belongs to an order of knights that the scribe belonged to. Their blacksmith will cut the crystals. That's the first task. It doesn't say anything else."

"Does it say where the castle is?" Andrew asked, stepping carefully over a large gnarled root. "Be careful, there's a huge root right here."

"Uh, someplace called the **Midnight Lake**." Yoshio replied.

"Oh fuck us." Alex groaned. "The **Midnight Lake** is right in the middle of the **Land of the Damned** on the twelfth floor. Nothing stays dead there. As soon as you kill something, it starts regaining health. You just have run as fast as you can while the enemies regen or you're fucked. Oh, and everything is two to three levels above you. Your health also doesn't regen unless you have health potions. So, you're fucked unless you have an incredibly high parry level, heavy armor, and sprint level. You get a shit ton of XP from the enemies though. That castle is the only safe place there. Everywhere else is just hell." The rest of the party paled.

"You're right." Andrew groaned. "Fuck us."

"If we finish the quest, we get; a shit ton of XP, armor or a weapon, the cut crystals, and a hidden optional reward." Yoshio stated.

"Wow." Tony whistled. "Hey, guys. I think that's the **Misty Forest**."

"Yup." Ameer said. "That does look like mist."

"Holy shit. When did it get dark?" Alex asked. It had indeed gotten dark. It was beginning to become hard to see.

"We need to find that cave now or we're fucked if we get attacked out here." Andrew said.

"Run." Tony said and the boys sprinted into the forest. As the boys ran deeper into the forest, it got darker and darker around them.

"There it is!" Tony exclaimed, pointing towards a blue glow coming from the mouth of a cave several feet in front of them. The party of five friends raced to the cave entrance. A message popped up in front of each boy, asking the if they wanted to enter the Wolf Den, to which they all said yes.

 _Wolf Den Floor 1_

 _Level 1-3_

"Okay." Ameer said, as the party of five entered the den. "If the wolves are at most level three, then we should be careful when moving forwards. We don't want to fight a level three wolf or we're fucked, seeing as I don't have **Field Medic** yet, none of us have **Battle Healing** , and we only have one **Health Potion** per person."

"Agreed. No Leeroy Jenkins." Andrew replied, with a pointed look at Alex who looked sheepishly down at the ground.

"Let's kill the **Den Mother** and get out of here." Tony said as the party moved cautiously through the cave. A shuffling sound caused them to halt their progress. With a growl, three wolves lunged at them from out of the shadows. The number one next to their name, indicated that the wolves were only level one. The boys effortlessly dispatched the wolves with no harm coming to themselves. "Let's take the **Wolf Pelts**. We can sell 'em to a vendor or have made into some leather armor."

"It's all yours Tony." Alex said. Tony nodded and collected the wolf pelts. The boys began moving deeper into the den once he was done. As they moved throughout the den, they easily killed the multitudes of wolves, with Tony taking the pelts each time. A loud howl resonated throughout the den.

"That has to be the **Den Mother**." Ameer whispered. The party of five turned a corner and were met with a large open area with dozens of wolves and a huge wolf curled up against the far wall.

"Shit." Yoshio whispered. "Those **Den Mother Guardians** are level three and the **Den Mother** is level four. Her **Pups** are level one though. I'm level three with no experience towards level four. How bout you guys.?"

"Three fourths of the way through level two." Alex said.

"Halfway through level two." Andrew replied.

"Three fourths of the way to level three." Tony replied.

"Halfway through level two." Ameer said. "How are you level three?"

" **Last Hit** bonus xp. Tony, I've got some **Pristine Pelts** for you."

"Awesome." Tony grinned. "So, how do we tackle this?"

Ameer whipped out the guidebook. "It says here that the **Den Mother** won't attack if her **Den Mother Guardians** are attacked and will only attack if she or her **Pups** are attacked."

"I'll draw aggro on the guardians and deal damage from the front while you guys deal damage from the back and get that bonus **Backstab Damage**." Yoshio said. "Since I'm an equal level to them, I'll be able to bring their health down fairly quickly. Save your **Health Potions** for the **Den Mother** unless you absolutely need to use them." His friends nodded in agreement. "Alright, let's do this shit." He charged at the Den Mother's Guardians and led them away from the Den Mother. He hacked and slashed at the wolves from the front while his friends did the same from the back. Every time a wolf tried to attack his friends he would attempt to do more damage than them to try and get the wolf's attention again.

Once all of the wolve's were dead, the party of five made sure everyone was healthy. "We're good." Alex said. "They never touched us. What's the plan now?"

Yoshio cracked his neck and said, "The **Pups** have such little health that one hit will kill them. I think you guys are close enough to level three that one of two of those guys will level you up. Once you do, focus your attention on the **Den Mother**. While you guys are killing the **Pups** , I'll handle the **Den Mother**. You ready?" With four nods, he charged at the Den Mother. He slashed and stabbed at the Den Mother's legs. Within moments, he was joined by his friends who were now level three. The too began hacking and slashing at the Den Mother. With an idea in mind, Yoshio jumped up and grabbed on the fur on the Den Mother's belly. He crawled over to where her heart would be and thrust his sword into her heart, getting a critical hit and killing the boss. The Den Mother shattered like glass and he dropped to the ground. "Damn." he groaned. "I got **Den Mother's Tooth** as a **Last Hit Reward**. It's a dagger, so you can have it Tony." He offered a trade with Tony, who accepted, and sent him the Pristine Pelts and the Den Mother's Tooth.

"Damn, does double damage against wolves." Tony grinned. "Nice." The other boys traded their Pristine Pelts to Tony as well.

"This is only Floor One." Ameer said. "Should we keep going?"

"No." Alex said as he looked at his guidebook. "This says that the second floor of the **Wolf Den** was overrun by **Poisoned Spiders** and the **Poisoned Spider Queen**. They're level five and six. We can come back if we want. Let's go to the farm and turn in the quest, then start on the next one."

"We might have to spend the night here." Tony sighed. "It's still night time, remember?"

"Damn. You're right." Alex cursed. "Alright, pull out your **Sleeping Rolls** and **Sleep Until Morning**." The boys pulled out their sleeping bags from their inventory and went to sleep.

 **An: I think that's a good place to stop this cancer. What do you guys think about me labeling Sword Art Online terms in bold during dialogue? Should I keep doing it or should I stop and kill myself? If anyone bitches at me for giving the United States Sword Art Online or for giving them an earlier release date than Japan, they can fuck off cause I don't want to hear it. It's called** _ **fanfiction**_ **for a reason. The OCs are purposefully OP and I plan on keeping it that way. I don't really expect this to get many views because it's so cancerous. Alright, well, I'm done writing this chapter. Don't forget to review the chapter, favorite the story, and follow to see chapter similar to this one. See ya.**


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